Navigating Back-to-School Stress as a Working Mother
Back-to-school season is an exciting time for both parents and children. There is so much to look forward to: new books to read, new friends to meet, and of course, adorable Picture Day photos of your little angels to gush about and hang on your refrigerator. But for working parents, especially working mothers, this time of year can also be a stressful one. Why is back-to-school season so stressful for working mothers? How can working moms manage their stress at the start of the school year while fulfilling their responsibilities both at work and at home?
This is an Especially Tough Year
If you’re feeling as though this back-to-school season is particularly tough, you're not alone. There are so many added burdens on our families and communities right now, including:
The pandemic: It goes without saying that Covid-19 has wrought havoc on our families, and although the pandemic is waning, many parents still worry about its impacts on their children’s school experience. From learning loss to the uncertainty of mask mandates at school to national teacher shortages, there are still many questions about what the future holds for families and how this ongoing health crisis will affect us.
Finances: Is the stress of inflation impacting your family’s back-to-school experience? A survey from the National Retail Federation found families plan to spend a whopping $864 on school supplies this year, an increase of $168 from 2019. Many families across the nation—and the world—are cutting back on luxuries or even essentials to buy school necessities for their kids, which can put a damper on what should be an exciting season.
Everything seems overwhelming these days: Between the devastating Supreme Court decision to repeal Roe v. Wade, job uncertainty, the imminent recession, and everything else going on in the world right now, I don’t blame you if you’re feeling on edge. Be kind to yourself and give yourself grace on the tough days. Nobody is perfect, and being a working mom is a particularly delicate balancing act—you must manage two worlds simultaneously.
So, what can working moms do to ease anxiety during back-to-school season?
Communicate with your child’s teacher. Some of the biggest concerns for working moms are transportation to and from school, homework, and keeping up with your kids’ grades. One of the best ways to stay ahead of a potential catastrophe in any of these domains is to keep the lines of communication open with teachers. Reach out on or before the first day, introduce yourself, and express a desire to stay in the loop about your child’s academics. Explain any potential transportation obstacles, and ask what resources are available for tutoring or other support. The teachers won’t judge—they spend all day with kids, and they’re often parents themselves to boot, so they can relate! Reach out and they’ll be more than happy to assist you.
Keep work at work and keep home at home. Though it can be difficult, try to maintain a boundary between your work responsibilities and your home responsibilities. Put your phone away while you’re playing with your kids and try not to check your computer after 5:00 pm. Remember, your boss won’t remember all the times you worked late—but your family might. Conversely, try not to hop on a Zoom call or walk in the office frazzled after a stressful school drop off. Try to remain present, focused, and in the moment wherever you are.
Take inventory of where your stress is coming from. Journaling is one of the best things you can do when you’re stressed. Even if it’s just a five-minute stream-of-consciousness jotted down in your Notes app, try to get in the habit of writing down your feelings when you’re anxious. Be mindful of the situation: What caused it? What were you doing when the stress hit? As you start to understand your own triggers, you can begin to predict anxiety before it begins and take measures to control it so it doesn’t overwhelm you.
Reach out to—and expand—your support network. Find other moms at work and swap tips about healthy meal, time management, or anything else you might be struggling with. Join a group for working parents and establish a carpool system if you struggle with transportation issues. Connect with neighborhood families whose kids go to school with yours and strengthen your relationships with them. And don’t forget to join Serenity Sanctuary, my online support group for professional women where we bond, uplift each other, organize fun events, and much more.
Final Thoughts
Back-to-school stress is natural. If this transitionary season is causing you anxiety, reach out to others for help so you’re not bearing this burden alone. Remember, there are no perfect parents. If nobody’s told you this today, you’re a wonderful mom, and you should be proud of yourself. Your children are lucky to have you in their lives!
Still need help? Consider getting a coach or join an online community dedicated to self-care and wellness.
